Tuesday, June 30, 2009

The moment.

It is time to close this blog. Because the adventure - at least part one of it - is over.

I am back in Singapore.

I am starting work.

And I am starting a new life, a life different from what I have in the US, and a life different from what I used to lead when I last lived here.

Now I am a Christian.

Now I am an active member of society.

Now I earn my own keep.

Soon I can truly call myself Singaporean.

What and where will I be heading to from now on? I do not know at this point, but I have evolved, and I will continue to evolve.

Evolution.
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Thursday, June 25, 2009

愛得太遲

Really - this song is popular because it speaks to a lot of us.

It speaks to ME.

Pardon my translation. I want this to reach out to more people... and this is a real story.


愛得太遲
歌手:古巨基 作曲:楊鎮邦 填詞:林夕

我過去 那死黨  早晚共對
My good friend and I were together day and night in the past
各也紮職以後 沒法暢聚
After we started working, we can do that no more
而終於相約到 但無言共對 疏淡如水
When we eventually get together, we have nothing to say to each other
We no longer feel for each other -

日夜做 見爸爸 剛好想呻
After working day and night, I saw my dad and just wanted to complain -
卻霎眼 看出他多了皺紋
But suddenly, I see more wrinkles on him
而他的蒼老感 是從來未覺 太內疚擔心
I have never sensed that he has gotten older
I feel regretful and worried...

最心痛是 愛得太遲
Love that comes too late is the most painful
有些心意 不可等某個日子
Certain gestures cannot wait till the right day
盲目地發奮 忙忙忙其實自私
It is actually selfish to work and keep oneself busy blindly
夢中也習慣 有壓力要我得志
I am used to it even in my dreams, that
I am expected to succeed
最可怕是 愛需要及時 只差一秒 心聲都已變歷史
The most scary thing is, love needs to come at the right time
One second passes and all would have become history
忙極亦放肆 見我愛見的相知
No matter how busy I am I still want to meet the one I love
要抱要吻要怎麼也好 偏要推說等下一次
To hug, to kiss, to do whatever
It has to be delayed till the next time

我也覺我體質彷似下降 看了症 得到是別要太忙
I also felt that I am getting weaker
The doctor said that I shouldn't be working too hard
而影碟都掃光  但從來未看 因有事趕
I have bought all the DVDs
But I have never watched them, because there are things to do
日夜做 儲的錢都應該夠  到聖誕 正好講跟我白頭
I worked day and night, I should have saved enough money
When Christmas came, I proposed to her
誰知她開了口 未能挨下去 已恨我很久
But she said, she couldn't wait for me already
And she had hated me for a long time

錯失太易 愛得太遲 我怎想到 她忍不到那日子
It is too easy to miss - my love came too late
How would I have thought, that she could not wait till that day
盲目地發奮 忙忙忙從來未知 幸福會掠過 再也沒法說鍾意
Working hard blindly, as I was keeping myself busy, I never knew
That happiness would fly by, and I cannot say I like her again
愛一個字 也需要及時 只差一秒 心聲都已變歷史
This word 'love', also has to be at the right time
One second passes and all would have become history
為何未放肆  見我愛見的相知
Why didn't I daringly try to meet the one I love
要抱要吻要怎麼也好 不要相信一切有下次
To hug, to kiss, to do whatever
Do not believe that there will always be a 'next time'

相擁我所愛又花幾多秒
How many seconds does it take to hug someone I love?
這幾秒 能夠做到又有多少
How much can I do in these few seconds?
未算少 足夠遺憾忘掉
Not little at all
Enough to regret and forget...

多少抱憾 多少過路人 太懂估計 卻不懂愛錫自身
How much regrets, how many passer-bys
Know how to calculate too well, but does not know how to take care of themselves
人人在發奮  想起他朝都興奮
Everyone is working hard; it is exciting to just think about the future
但今晚未過 你要過也很吸引
But tonight is not over yet -
If you want it to be over, that is enticing too
縱不信運 你不過是人 理想很遠 愛於咫尺卻在等
Although you do not believe in destiny, you are still just human
Your ambitions are far-fetched, love is right next to you yet it is waiting
來日別操心 趁你有能力開心
Don't worry too much about your future
Live a happy life while you still can
世界有太多東西發生 不要等到天上俯瞰
There are too many things happening in this world
Do not wait until you have to watch from heaven...

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Sunday, June 21, 2009

細水長流

對我們這些華校生來說, 這首歌是有特別的意義的...

尤其是現在 - 即將要分離的時刻.

其實, 無論是那一種感情, 在一段轟轟烈烈過後, 都必須回歸平靜, 進入細水長流的狀態, 才有可能持久...

'黃河之水天上來'般的感情, 除非你的愛是無窮盡的, 我們一介凡人, 如何能有精力維持?

我們 - 還是細水長流吧. 朋友們, 我們三十年以後, 去溫哥華吃燒鵝!



細水長流 - 梁文福

年少時候 誰沒有夢
無意之中 你將心願透露
就在你生日的時候 我將小小口琴送
最難忘記 你的笑容

友情的細水慢慢流 流進了你我的心中
曾在球場邊為你歡呼 你跌傷我揹負
夜裡流星飛渡 想像着他日的路途
晚風聽着我們壯志無數

年少時候 誰沒有愁
滿腔憤概 唯有你能聽得懂
每當我失意的時候 你將那首歌吹奏
琴聲悠悠 解我輕憂

歲月的細水慢慢流 流到了別離的時候
輕拍你的肩 聽我說朋友不要太惆悵
霓虹縱然再囂張 我們的步履有方向
成敗不論切莫將昔日遺忘

多年以後 又再相逢
我們都有了疲倦的笑容
問一聲我的朋友 何時再為我吹奏
是否依舊 是否依舊

人生的際遇千百種 但有知心長相重
人願長久 水願長流 年少時候

1990 - Singapore.

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Tuesday, June 16, 2009

知足

This song is forever going to be on my playlist... I love it to bits.

五月天 - 阿信版:


梁靜茹版:


怎麼去擁有 一道彩虹 怎麼去擁抱 一夏天的風
天上的星星 笑地上的人 總是不能懂 不能覺得足夠

如果我愛上 你的笑容 要怎麼收藏 要怎麼擁有
如果你快樂 不是為我 會不會放手 其實才是擁有

當一陣風吹來 風箏飛上天空 為了你而祈禱 而祝福 而感動
終於你身影 消失在 人海盡頭 才發現 笑著哭 最痛

那天你和我 那個山丘 那樣的唱著 那一年的歌
那樣的回憶 那麼足夠 足夠我天天 都品嚐著寂寞

Hey please nothing to do with my state of mind. I am just naturally fond of songs like this.

And I am rather amused about what people have been talking about these days (random, baseless, nonsensical rumours and teases that if Grace is around I think she will kill all of us)... Though, while being very open about my past, present, life philosophies and bottom line such that people do not find me interesting at all (this is my strategy of keeping myself rumour-free - and I don't just say those 曖昧 'NOOOO-es' to rumours about myself that came to me - I WARN those people about consequences :P), I managed to guard other people's history pretty well. I am rather proud of myself :)

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Sunday, June 14, 2009

Packing Stage 2.

I spent the whole day sorting out stuff in my room today - what to pack home and what to throw, give out and sell. Basically I can afford to fill up 3 bags and that is it.

Dug out some stuff that I still kept with me -



This is a poster that each of us made on the last day of OBS - basically, you write stuff on it and let others write on it too.

I digitised it and ditched it - I can't possibly keep everything can I.



This is the first pair of boarding passes that brought me to the USA. I have no idea why I still have them - I thought I started collecting boarding passes only when I got my new passport wallet. Anyway they are staying happily with their friends now...

What interesting change. I used to think - SQ is a must for long-haul. Now - that is just stupidity... Unless SQ has a competitive price and gives me miles, I will not buy their tickets. I have learnt to realise that paying less money and collecting those miles so that I can go for more trips more cheaply is a way better idea compared to paying for more and get no miles for 3 better meals (you probably don't know what you are eating anyway). I don't get more legroom; and for entertainment system - CX, VS, NH, KE - even DL - has comparable systems...

I definitely changed also in terms of what I am concerned about. The reflection that I wrote on another piece of OBS material after the whole thing has something like 'I know it will be hard for me to find a partner...' Now - since I have already left it to God, what is there for me to worry about? That doesn't occupy my life that much anymore - there are more interesting things to focus on...

But I do still kaypoh about other people's lives. Heh.

Ah. I still feel kind of regretful about the kind of crap life I have when I was a freshman. I don't even want to classify that as 'memories' because it is not pleasant. Too many 'I should have done this and not this...' kind of stuff. Well, it is not too late to realise that is truly not what I want...

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