Spring Break.
Wow the last time I actually wrote something here was 8 March :PAnyway, I must thank all my friends in Madison who gave me a really wonderful time! I did not want to leave...
It is a really warm feeling to know that friends are genuinely happy that I am there, and that they are pouring all their hospitality on me - I can really feel it! :) Thank you so much!
Before Madison I was doing HCF's spring break urban plunge in SW Baltimore. I did the same thing last year - last year it wasn't a stay-over programme, and we were at each site only in passing, but indeed it was a great learning experience and more importantly my first step in being an active Christian - a step that I want to make but had never known how to make.
This year I was helping to plan it and led some of the discussions. It had not failed to be inspiring, and had made me realise the main shortcomings that I have hindering me in putting my words into action. Also - I mean, two years ago, I would not have imagined myself doing these stuff that I am doing today; it is the Spirit at work, it is the grace of God - through the HCF people and Grace, who decided to make the 'serious and intellectual' xiaoyang (this is not I say one okay) the target of her invitations without even knowing what I have been up to on my own.
What I was obsessed about two years ago was basically condensed in a question that Songyu and Gerald asked me on the car yesterday. I have told my story quite a couple of times - I actually didn't realise that Songyu has never heard it before. I cannot publish the whole thing here, but the abridged form is simply - I have realised that what happened and what I hoped for in 2006 - 2007 was not built on the right foundation. We were very different in terms of values and world-view and I didn't realise that - which I finally did, and I am glad that I did. I do not know if she had ever liked me before but it is now inconsequential.
(Actually one more thing that I didn't realise was - how widely spread was the impression at that time. I only realised that recently when Kenneth, wz etc. all came to ask me about it separately and I was forced to ask them - where did they get the impression from...?! I will not deny anything, because it happened - if I cannot even be honest to myself, how can I convince others to trust me?)
Luke 6:46-49 -
"Why do you call me, 'Lord, Lord,' and do not do what I say? I will show you what he is like who comes to me and hears my words and puts them into practice. He is like a man building a house, who dug down deep and laid the foundation on rock. When a flood came, the torrent struck that house but could not shake it, because it was well built. But the one who hears my words and does not put them into practice is like a man who built a house on the ground without a foundation. The moment the torrent struck that house, it collapsed and its destruction was complete."
Jesus wants us to actively build our foundations on him, not on our own hopes and ambitions. Extend the 'Stardust' metaphor that I used to tell and still hold on to, and you will know what my attitude of life is...
Labels: Life, Philosophy and Religion, Relationships
